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Im was asked to be the best man at my friends wedding, so my question is “what are my duties and responsibilities?
Plan (and keep the bachelor safe at) the bachelor party, make sure he gets to the church on time, and write a nice toast, drive them home on thier wedding night and pick them up to drive them to the airport for the honeymoon trip. (They will be tired so bringing along a sack of Egg McMuffins will win you a souvenir t-shirt). Make sure you tell them that you really meant what you said and are honored that you are the first person they were with on thier first morning as a wedded couple.
From now until the wedding you should act as his PR man and ask him if there is anything he would like help with. Although if it’s a typical engagement the future wife will be all over the details when it comes to tuxedos and such so your job will be limited.
Congratulations and best of luck. Remind him to ‘have fun’!
who owudl ur best man be and why?
my bbest friend. you sure do have alot of werid questions huh?
I’m being a best man on friday and I need some tips on public speaking, as I’m not really accustomed to it. I have the speech, I think it’s pretty good – well, ok at least – but I am incredibly nervous and my buggest fear is not being able to speak well through fear. Any suggestions on how to approach this?
Fear of public speaking is very common. In your case, although you’ll be speaking publicly, your statements will be directed toward the couple. My suggestion is that you remember you’ll be talking to the couple, as opposed to the crowd. Focus on them when you talk. Weddings aren’t like presentations at work. The crowd is a lot more happy, and a lot less judgmental. I’ve been to a wedding or two in my day. By the time speeches are made, half of the crowd is half tanked. You should make sure you’re not. Save most of your drinking until AFTER your speech is made, but one or two might loosen you up. In the meantime, read your speech over and over again, until you can say it without reading it from a paper. Feeling confident that you can say all the words, without tripping over your tongue, will keep you from feeling as nervous.
Remember that it’ll be over in a few seconds.
My dad is the best man in a Hindu wedding and was recently told that he is supposed to give the bride a wrapped gift. I am not sure if a best man even exists in the Hindu wedding ceremony but what ever he is, he is the one that is supposed to give the wrapped gift to the bride. We are catholic so we have no idea what he is supposed to give. Can someone help us?
Thanks
A traditional Hindu wedding does not have a best man. Most probably this particular wedding might be blending traditions of East and West. Why don’t you ask some of the relatives as to what they’re expecting. Usually ladies are given saris as gifts but I don’t know whether you can buy saris where you’re staying. Or some silverware used in Hindu rituals, but again, I don’t know if it’s available where you are.
The best thing you can do is ask. Then you can participate fully and more confidently in the wedding.
Be sure to take a camera. Hindu weddings are usually very colourful with lots of elaborate customs.
I was chosen by the groom to be the best man. I need to make a best man wedding speech. But I am feeling that I have no ideas to include in my best man wedding speech. Can anyone give me some good tips please?
I guess you are feeling the responsibility of delivering good best man wedding speeches. Try not to get so nervous. It has been a great honor that you have been chosen by the groom as the best man for this special moment for the couple. Feel confident as you know the groom better than anyone else. Besides the best man wedding speech you also have to coordinate the wedding and reception so that everything runs smoothly.
Try to plan in advance as to have time to create a quality speech.
As you begin your best man wedding speech, it is important to introduce yourself first and then thank the bride and groom’s parents for inviting everyone to the wedding.
Include some jokes. You can find many on-line wedding jokes as to gain the guests attention. Try to keep all your jokes ‘PG’ rated.
Tell a story about how you got to know the couple. Try to show through your stories, what kind of person the groom is. Try to mention good qualities.
Say why the newly weds are a perfect match and finally it would be time to toast. You can conclude your best man wedding speech by offering them a word of advice for the future. Wish them luck and ask everyone to raise their glass and congratulate them on the new life they are about to begin together.
A friend of mine wanted to make best man wedding speeches and he found this link very useful: http://hubpages.com/hub/Giving-the-Best-Wedding-Speech
My sister’s boyfriend asked me to be the best man and money is extremely tight at the moment. If anyone has any suggestions for an inexpensive bachelor party, tux, gifts, and everything you know, please let me know what to do.
my fiance’s best friend is only spending $50, but it depends on the wedding… some want tuxedos (I don’t – just your best black suit) tux rentals are about 150… then there’s the bachelor’s party… I’d say 250 MAXIMUM and that’s including the wedding gift if your funds are tight… or go in together with all the groomsmen
I am the best man and would like to sing a really good song that is appropriate during my best man speech. I cant come up with any that fit. I am a legit singer and have been for years so it’s not for a gag or joke. I want it to be meaningful not like im stealing the spotlight. The wedding is Aug. 14th of this year. And help or suggestions would be gretly appreciated. Thank You In Advance.
Our wedding song was we only just begun by the Carpenters. I had two other songs picked out but they played only one. Best Wishes!
My dad is getting married at the end of the month and I’m having a bit of trouble coming up with my ‘best man’ speech. I’ve looked online but there really isnt much help for daughter’s being their father’s best man.
Thanks,
Write whatever comes from your heart.
You know your dad best, not us.
My cousin just asked me to be his best man and I have no idea what I’m doing. The wedding is next July so I have plenty of time. Thanks for the help.
Well, it depends. If you are good when it comes to public speaking and think you can keep the audience engaged then you can speak for 10 to 15 minutes. If your speech is funny and the audience find it entertaining then you shouldn’t have any problem even if the speech is longer than a typical best man speech.
However, if you not very accustomed to public speaking (you’re not alone if you do … so, don’t worry), then you might want to keep your speech short … anything between 3 – 4 minutes should be enough to express your thoughts.
To make the process easier get your speech written and see if it sounds good to you. If required read it to a friend and find if you need to add or omit something. Finally, rehearse your speech so hat you can be familiar to it. Familiarity creates confidence. The more familiar you get, the more confident you’ll become. And when you are confident words will flow out of you effortlessly.
Here’s an outline of a best man speech -
- Briefly introduce yourself
- In what way you’re relationship with the groom is special
- Share a funny (and related to the occasion) anecdote
- Praise the bride
- Talk about the bride and the groom as ‘one’ (a couple)
- Thank the guests, the organizers, the bridal party etc.
- Finish it off by toasting the newlyweds
So, that could be the skeleton of your speech. You can, depending on your ability to speak in front of an audience, take anything between 3 minutes to 15 minutes to make it sound great.
By the way, it’s good that you got started with the preparation so early – it’s one of the key factors to be successful with best man speeches.
My best wishes.
My husband just got asked my his brother to be his best man at his wedding next spring. We live on the west coast, they in the east. So we’ll only be in the east for the wedding for a few days to a week. (?) Is he responsible for the bachelor party? Does he have to pay for that? Does he have to make a speech?
We’ve never been involved in a wedding party and aren’t sure of what his duties/repsonsibilites are. Can someone please fill us in on the best man etiquette?
Thanks!
While it is not an absolute, it is generally accepted that the best man throws the bachelor party. I understand the problem that you are having in that your husband is on a completely different coast than his brother, which makes planning the party very difficult. Even so, I still think that it is important for the best man to still be VERY involved in planning the bachelor party. While he may not know the best restaurant in town to get a good steak or spiciest chicken wings, he should still take as active a role as possible in coming up with ideas and making sure that the blueprint for the night is organized and solid before arriving in town.
Because your situation is different, being on a different coast and all, I recommend your husband speak to the groom and have him recommend another friend or relative as a “proxy” that knows the area (and probably his local friends) better. That way your husband will act as more of a strategist, while the proxy works on the details. Yes, the proxy will end up doing a lot of the grunt work — but your husband’s job will be to take over for them when he arrives on the east coast.
As for paying, he is ABSOLUTELY NOT responsible for that. All of the expenses, including the groom’s, should be split between all the invitees. This is sometimes where people get into trouble, though. They don’t take into consideration the budgets of the attendees and end up going to expensive places that people can’t afford. That’s why it is so important for the planner to (a) get a good feeling of what people can spend and (b) get their approval on the plan, so that they know what they’re getting into.
As for speeches… Yes, the best man is expected to be able to make a speech. It should be written well before hand and — yes — practiced. There is nothing more painful than watching someone stumble and bumble through a 10 minute speech filled with “ums” and “uhs.” The amount of time he spends preparing for it will be more than paid for in a relaxed and (hopefully!) succinct speech.
I’ve written about what the role of the best man and how to plan a bachelor party in several articles I’ve written for my website, DoomedGroom.com. I’ve linked to the site below.
I hope this helps!